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Wha?

If stuff this idiotic can be published by a NYT columnist, then I am obviously getting short-changed on the reader count for this blog (not that I don’t love you guys! I do!).  Or, I chose the wrong line of work when casting about after the USSR collapsed.

Oh, wait.  President Obama is older than I am, so if he wasn’t “shaped” by the Cold War, then obviously my college years must never have happened at all.

Sheesh.

I have been having a cruddy couple of weeks, so that is all you get, people.

Color me curmudgeonly!

  • Lyric of the day:  ”broken glass, broke and hungry, broken hearts and broken bones”
  • Flashback of the day: The Lyceum
  • What’s playing now? Switchfoot’s “Mess of Me,” off Hello Hurricane
  • Photo of the day:

The D-Day Landing isn't emotionally remote for anyone, you moron

Hey Cohen: the D-Day Landing isn't "emotionally remote" even to a curmudgeon like me, you idiot. I love you, Grandpa! Thank you for your service.

Pipers on Parade

I miss the Olympics.  It’s still tough to come home after work and find that CNBC is broadcasting the annoying and useless “Squawk Box,” instead of curling matches.

On the other hand, Spring seems to be really, really, really trying to…well, spring.  This weekend was completely freaking beautiful, and the weatherman says it’s supposed to stay warm all week.  As I got off the train this morning, I was thinking, “Man, why didn’t I get my act together and bike in?  Sheesh!”  So, maybe tomorrow.  (I’ll have to try and make it up by walking home from the Metro.)  Soon we’ll have flowers and whatnot.  Hmm, I guess this means it’s almost allergy time.  Helloooo, flowering trees!

To celebrate this gorgeous weekend, I did manage to haul myself out of the house for a while and attend Alexandria’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade.  There were more pipers – and Irish dancers – than you could shake a pot o’ gold at…and many of those pipers were from Alexandria’s trusty Scots organizations.  One gentleman joked that they were there to “keep the Irish from getting into fights, you know, just generally keep them in line!”  Of course, he was wearing a fox-head sporran.   Ah, the ethnicity.  I took a lot of photos, but have not bothered to process them yet.  Let’s face it, usually the last thing I want to do at home is look at my computer.

All in all, it was quite an entertaining parade.  There were no less than three different dancing schools represented in varying degrees of fancy dress.  Of course there were the seeming millions of pipers!  A local Bolivian dance troupe strutted their stuff as well.  It was hard for me to not adopt a Basset hound on the spot when the BROOD marched by.  (Those dogs know who their friends are…no less than five of them waddled up to say hello to me.)  One particularly, well, let’s call him enthusiastic photog, busy trying to get a shot of a motorcycle cop in front of him, was nearly run down by the rest of the squadron coming up behind him.  Ten spectators yelling at him?  Sirens?  He was unmoved.

I was impressed with the size of the crowd — I guess people were desperate to get out!

Perhaps most entertainingly, the sunshine brought out these folks:

Lord O'Vader leads the troops

Lord O'Vader leads his troops

The friendliest Vader I’ve ever seen posed with kids and adults alike for photos and even danced a jig while he was lining up his troops.  See, people think that I’m some kind of Star Wars freak…but I think we can all agree that you wouldn’t find me in this group.  There are better things for me to spend my money on, than custom-made Imperial armor.  I am, however, looking forward to seeing both these folks and some Jedi when I do indulge my inner dork at this year’s Yuri’s Night at Goddard.  They were hilarious last year.

Happy spring, everyone!  Go for a walk at lunch time!

  • Lyric of the day: “I will be in the bar, with my head on the bar”
  • Flashback of the day:  Ellie’s corned beef and cabbage
  • What’s playing now? Rise Against’s “Life Less Frightening,” off Siren Song of the Counter-Culture.
  • Photo of the day:
OMG SO CUTE

OMG SO CUTE

Something for Nothing

So, this week the “temporary” Metro fare increases took effect.  Yesterday I managed to catch a bus from the Metro stop to the office, and the man who got on after me spent my entire ride ranting at the top of his lungs that his fare was $1.45.  I’m not kidding; I wear noise-isolating earbuds and had my iPod on at half-volume, but I could hear every word he said.  OK, so it was only a few blocks, but it was still incredibly rude and annoying.

$1.45!  Not counting the $.50 Metro-to-bus fare discount!  Or free bus-to-bus transfers on practically any bus system in the DC metro area!  Or $.50 off bus-to-Metro fare!  Or the $.10 SmartTrip discount!

Oh noes!  The humanity!

Yeah…buddy?  This is what happens when people insist on getting something for nothing.  Don’t blame me, people.  I vote in favor of the tax increase every time it comes up, but it never passes.  Then people complain that their fare has to go up, or the potholes on their roads don’t get fixed fast enough.  Or (my favorite) we start seeing ads on buses that say, “What if you called 911, but no one was there to answer? Don’t cut the County police force!”

Services, meet taxes.  Taxes, I’d like you to meet services.  Shake hands and play nice, now.

Sigh.  I believe I’ve written this post before.  More than once.

I’m feeling blue this week, so forgive my ranting.  I mean, who wouldn’t be?  The Olympics are over; no more Curling on TV!  On the up side, though:  Tonight I get to see Joshua Bell!  Tomorrow is National Grammar Day!

  • Lyric of the day: “You’re burnin’ up for me and that’s a fact”
  • Flashback of the day: Matball rules:  +100 for hitting the Raider, -1000 for hitting the American flag.  Or something like that.
  • What’s playing now? Simple Minds’ “Sanctify Yourself,” off Once Upon a Time.
  • Photo of the day:

Cloudy, like the weather (and my head) today.

Cloudy, like the weather (and my head) today.

He! Could! Go! …uh, away

Please, no.

Please, don’t wreck my NFLN with this man.  NFLTA without Rich Eisen?  Too horrible to even contemplate.

Even worse, the thought of Boomer polluting my beloved NFL RZ.  Scott Hansen has the most awesome, and most difficult, job I can think of in sports broadcasting and he does it skillfully, with humor and personality, while actually knowing what he’s talking about.

I was always a KeithAndDan girl anyway.

  • Lyric of the day: “So make the move, cos I ain’t got all night”
  • Flashback of the day: BMOC quarterback spotting me after class and giving me a lift back to the dorm; how he folded his 6′7″ frame into that tiny car I’ll never know.  During his brief NFL career I was an enthusiastic booster, even though he was on the Chiefs.
  • What’s playing now? Rise Against’s “Savior,” off Appeal to Reason.
  • Photo of the day:
Is the Abominable Snow Storm Monster going to consume my mom's house?

Is the Abominable Snow Storm Monster going to consume my mom's house?

Some folks have been complaining, as happens every time, about how the network arranges its Olympic coverage.  It’s too easy to have results before the event, so watching it in prime time is boring;  it’s annoying to only see a few athletes instead of whole competitions all the way through; those feature pieces are annoying; etcetera.

I’m actually not annoyed at all, though.  I take care not to get results during the day.  For two weeks every four years, I can turn off the NPR and avoid the WaPo website.  (I do the same thing during March Madness.)  I’ve sometimes even resorted to changing my voice mail greeting, so that callers won’t inadvertently supply me with results.  It’s not that difficult.

Then, I DVR the prime time coverage.  This way, I can start viewing  from the recording buffer, which lets me fast forward through commercials, feature stories that don’t interest me (and some of them can be sort of sweet.  I’m still a girl, after all), and events that are lame like ski cross (ugh) and women’s halfpipe (zzzzzzz).  For instance, on Monday I watched the new Top Gear episode before switching over to my Olympic recording.  It worked out great!

And finally; look.  People can bitch all they want about the figure skating, but here’s the thing: it’s no accident that the figure skating events are the ones that have been live in the end of prime time.  It’s because the Canadian organizers of the event, which is taking place on the West Coast in the Pacific time zone, care just as much about ratings (especially in the Eastern part of Canada, where most of the people actually live — just like the US!  Uncanny!) as any other entertainment executives would, and deliberately made it so that they would be broadcast in prime time.  And that’s because chicks who don’t like ANY OTHER SPORT, always watch it.

Oh, and yes, I watched the Russia-Czech Republic and USA-Canada hockey games on MSNBC.  They were awesome games!  I hope the sport picks up new American fans!  The coverage was good (largely due to the presence of Mike Emrick and the absence of Al Michaels), but then I still watched the figure skating too.   Yes, I stayed up past midnight the next night, to watch the ice dancing finals and the medal ceremony.

In the end, I’m just a sports fan.  I know what to expect from multi-sport coverage, so I prepare to make the viewing experience as enjoyable as I can.  Sometimes it’s not so easy, but I try anyway.  Why is that so hard for people?

And, since I am, at heart, just a sports fan, what does the Olympic coverage always make me long for?  The Wide World Of Sports.

  • Lyric of the day: “I’d go for broke if I could be wit chu”
  • Flashback of the day:  Vacationing in AK during the ‘96 summer games.  SB bursting in at the end of each day, asking, “Whose butt did we kick today?!”
  • What’s playing now?  Cage the Elephant’s “Back against the Wall,” off Cage the Elephant.
  • Photo of the day:
Teddy is pleased; pitchers and catchers reported this week!

Teddy is pleased; pitchers and catchers reported this week!

Belated Bitches Birthday Bits

OMG.  People.  Yesterday was LMHF’s birthday.

What can a person even say about a person as awesome as LMHF?  I hardly know where to begin.  Let’s begin at the beginning, when we first met as rising fourth-years.  And what a fourth year it was.  It was SAJ, who moved in to our place at the end of that summer (another stroke of luck that is almost beyond description) who first introduced my roommate and I to LMHF.  Instantly the four of us became like peas in a pod, and the Bitches were born.

Telling college stories would be highly entertaining, yet highly incriminating to someone who’s since gone on to become a successful career woman, wife, and mother.   Suffice to say that every time I recycle, I think of you, LMHF.  And I think we’re all still recuperating from the infamous and unbelievable Mardi Gras-Birthday Festival at The Party House.  And that particular bacchanal took place way back in the 90s!

When LMHF met JBF, it was like chocolate and peanut butter meeting for the first time.  Two great, fantastic individuals, happy together, and who have made a wonderful family.  I’ve never seen a happier groom than JBF at the conclusion of his wedding vows.  His grin silently asked all of us there, “Did I just win the lottery, or what?!”

Yes, JBF, you did.  You sure as hell did.

I hope that you had a great birthday, and that they only get better.

Back in the Day, Bitches

Back in the Day, Bitches (swiped shamelessly from JS, our beloved honorary)

Go Figure

Last night was the Olympic men’s free skate.  Of course, I watched.  I thoroughly enjoyed it, but just can’t seem to make heads or tails of Scott Hamilton’s noises.  Is he praising the skater for hanging on, or criticizing for not being perfect?  Is he happy or sad?  It’s confusing.  However, he’s  obviously very enthusiastic and when he actually gets going using real words, he certainly knows what he’s talking about (Al Michaels, I’m looking at you).

I had just a few broadcast-related thoughts while watching the competition:

  1. With all the talk of Plushenko’s attempt to be the first to successfully defend an Olympic championship since Dick Button, then how about some footage of Dick Button?
  2. And what about how Lysacek, if he won, would be just the latest American world champion to also become Olympic champion, yet at the same time the last world champion to win Olympic gold was Scott Hamilton.  Hey, he’s sitting right there, how about some footage of Scott Hamilton?
    Hey, guess who was calling that skate? That’s right, it was Dick Button.  Man, look, it’s the same ice as the hockey rink.  Remember your Ice Castles, kids? “Red line!  Blue line!  Red line!  Do an axel!  OMG THE FLOWERS!”
  3. You could set up one of those feature pieces you love so much, NBC, about American men’s figure skating, the old v. the new scoring systems, the advent of the quadruple jump, how all this evolved in relation to the loss of compulsory figures.
  4. You could set up one of those feature pieces you love so much, NBC, about Russian men’s figure skating, how the USSR dominated, how the Unified Team pulled it off, how the mid-90s Russians had NOTHING but still pulled it off, how the former stars/coaches are in the West now (e.g., Viktor Petrenko).  They unwittingly alluded to this while talking about the Kazakh skater; how there were no indoor rinks in the whole country when he was a kid…
  5. Seriously, NBC. How long have these people been covering international skating competitions?  No one on the team could let you know the following facts about Johnny Weir since you were so busy talking about how he is a Russophile (to avoid talking about uh…other aspects of his personality):
    • he crosses himself in the Orthodox manner
    • he says, “Thank you Lord,” in Russian at the end of each program
    • that Cyrillic lettering on his boot was his name, transliterated.
  6. Boy, it sure is still a judged sport.  Johnny Weir was underscored.  And he had a great quote:  “I’m an Olympian, I’m a good athlete; people sometimes forget that because of my personality.” I thought his quieting of the crowd was quite sweet.
  7. Anyone who has bedazzled blade guards and wears a garland of roses while waiting for his marks surely deserves five extra points!
  8. In case you hadn’t noticed, I sort of love Johnny Weir.  He’s just…awesome.  The ever-adorable Chris Hayes had a great idea: he should totally be a guest on Glee next season.  In all his fabulous glory.
  9. This trend with the gloves?  It’s got to go.
  10. Poor Oda; his lace difficulty was unfortunate, but man did he recover well.  Great job picking up exactly where he had left off and finishing strong.  Did anyone else have nightmarish flashbacks to Tonya Harding’s crying jag when her lace broke?  This was much better.
  11. Women’s halfpipe is boring.

Can you tell I have Olympic fever?

  • Lyric of the day: “without you next to me, I toss and turn like the sea”
  • Flashback of the day: the rampant speculation as to whether Katarina Witt would defect, every time the European Championships or the Olympics came around.
  • As I write this, what’s playing? The Clash’s “This is Radio Clash”
  • Photo of the day:
Before you know it, the ground will look like this

Before you know it, the ground will look like this

RSSuperfriends

Wonder Woman (wikimedia)

Wonder Woman (wikimedia)

You know, I don’t actually read comics, graphic novels, whatever, though I do enjoy the films. Why do I need to read them when there is dorky commentary like this just waiting in my RSS reader? So, so awesomely dorky. I don’t understand all of it, but love it anyway!  To me, that’s the perfect meta-experience and an example of what the blogosphere is all about.

It’s sort of odd, in a way, that a girl as dorky as I am doesn’t read comics.  One of the crucial tools in my being taught to read as a toddler was the use of Wonder Woman comic books.  Plus, Super Friends, The Incredible Hulk and Wonder Woman were definitely prime choices on our TV when I was a kid back in the 70s.  Goodness, how I longed to have my very own invisible jet.  Maybe that’s why I like the movies so much, though?  It’s weird.

And I won’t even start on how much I adore Smallville.  They have been thisclose to turning Clark into Superman for a long time now, but I keep on watching just to see how they resolve Jimmy’s death in the end.  Basically, it’s going to require some time travel, and it’s really all about the means.  I have my theory, and it does not involve flying around the Earth.  But, oh noes!  Does the Superman film reboot change the films-based timeline of Smallville?

See, it’s easy to go meta with this stuff.

Wonder Woman, by the way, is still my favorite Hallow-e’en costume evah.  Thanks, mom.  Someday I should do a grown-up version.  But that would require going out on Hallow-e’en, which is a whole other blog post…

  • Lyric of the day: “The music played and played as we whirled wihout end”
  • Flashback of the day: when the AφA line serenaded my first-year roommate outside our dorm-room window, but she shushed them and sent them packing.
  • As I write this, what’s playing? L7’s “Pretend We’re Dead,” off Bricks are Heavy
  • Photo of the day:
Wonder Woman doesn't need a Nike...she's got the Lasso of Truth!

Wonder Woman doesn't need a Nike...she's got the Lasso of Truth!

South Crazy-lina

SC State Rep Mike Pitts (scstatehouse.gov)

SC State Rep Mike Pitts (scstatehouse.gov)

You remember how I posted about the South Carolina Lieutenant Governor, and his ridiculous and offensive statements about how the public shouldn’t support poor people, because they might “breed?”

Well, I know you were worried that he might be lonesome out there on the fringes all by himself.  He’s not alone, my friends.  Never fear!  State Representative Mike Pitts (R-Crazytown — oops, I mean Laurens) has introduced a bill to outlaw the use of Federal Reserve notes in his state, in favor of silver and gold coins.

No, seriously:

On and after the effective date of this article, this State shall not recognize, employ, or compel any person or entity to recognize or employ anything other than silver and gold coin as a legal tender in payment of any debt

And it would take effect immediately upon being signed.  No need for any lead time, when you’re changing currency.  No!

They need to pay for all their tchotchkes from Pedro’s in silver dollars!  I can see the sign on I-95 now:  “Paper today, silver tamale!”

Senior Night Bits

It’s an early day: Basketball Senior Night for the Dance Team.  Zoikes.  Just as I stopped feeling old from the Football Senior Night, here comes another one.  Plus, I have to take my car in for repairs tonight.  (Have I mentioned that it is completely awesome having a mechanic in the family?  He’s totally trustworthy!  Such a relief.)  Dear Old Dad has agreed to lend me some wheels until repairs are complete, which should make life a bit simpler.  Anyhow…these tasks, combined with the post-snowpocalyptic traffic dystopia of recent days, mean that I’ll be heading home at an early hour to pick up the car and head west.

UPDATE: Yes, my car repairs are reasonably priced, speedily completed, and I can 100% trust that they are correct and perfect.  Thanks, man.  You.  Are.  Awesome.

Per AKW’s request I have straightened my hair and, in an attempt to look nice, have actually applied makeup in advance of the evening’s festivities.  We’ll see how that works out.

  • Lyric of the day: “I hear your footsteps in the street, it won’t be long before we meet, it’s obvious”
  • Flashback of the day: Skating at Bear Mountain
  • As I write this, what’s playing? The Fixx’ “The Sign of Fire,” off Reach the Beach.
  • Photo of the day:
Fish, City Square, Charlestown, Boston. Don't stick your tongue out at me! Do fish have tongues?

Fish, City Square, Charlestown, Boston. Don't stick your tongue out at me! Do fish have tongues?

Go Hornets!

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